While pretending to be the daughter:

Rosie: Time for bed, sweetie!

Me: But Mama, I’m scared! There are monsters under my bed!

Rosie (looks under bed): Those are just squirrels.

Me: No! They’re monsters! I’m scared and need you to stay with me.

Rosie (looks under bed again): Well, they’re just little monsters.

Me: No, they’re big monsters! Help me not be scared, Mama! I know there are monsters under there!

Rosie (peers under the bed once again and then brings her face to meet mine, whispering): YOU’RE RIGHT.

* * *

Bonkers impromptu dinner conversation that I gamely joined:

Noah (apropos to nada): Grasshopper made of eyeballs!

Me: Penguin on roller skates!

Rosie: Chicken on the moon!

Noah: Cockroach made of fingernails!

Me: Fish with a hairy bottom!

Rosie: MONSTERS ON A BOAT!

Noah: Polar bear fighting an ant! AND LOSING.

Editor’s note: We’re traveling back in time a bit to recount the beginning of Rachel’s life as a mom of three. She lives with her husband and brood in Decatur. She blogs at yestertimeblog.com.